Friday, January 06, 2006

Dress of Doom

Try as I might not to be paranoid about inanimate objects, I'm bombarded with reasons not to trust them.

Today I became convinced that my dress is out to get me. The very same dress that became infamous due to the tornado incident struck again in a vicious attempt to expose me. One of the wonderful people in tech services did a double take, then called my attention to a seam split. Where you ask? Why in the most embarrassing and hardest to see spot (from the my perspective). Right smack dab on my glutius maximus. While this wear and tear damage is hardly complimentary to the size of my assets (hehe no pun intended), it also is in a place I wouldn' t have noticed. I try my best not to walk around staring at my butt....people were starting to complain....;p

So, here I am stuck at work with my tighty whities exposed again. *sigh* At least we're making some progress. My co-workers actually told me this time! More than that, I got two offers of sweaters to tie around my waist and a sewing kit!!
Thank you guys for not leaving me to walk around like that for a cheap laugh!!!!! (I wonder if they're feeling okay?)

I resisted the sweater at first hoping that walking with my hands behind my back would be enough to cover the spot. (I felt a little shy about tying someone else's sweater around my rear quarters). However, a sweet patron I was later helping was also nice enough to point that spot out. The fact that she was elderly wearing thick glasses was enough to shatter my little fantasy world.

So, I swiftly ran to circulation and snatched up the proferred sweater and tied it around my waist with many a thanks.

After I get home, me and this dress are going to have a serious talk. If it doesn't mend it's evil ways, I will threaten incineration.

You're not paranoid if everyone really is out to get you.


Blogger Happy Villain said...

I have the same problem, but it's "my girls" always trying break out and try solo tours. For this reason, I keep a short chain of safety pins in my purse at all times, to pin back together whatever button or seam my girls try to burst in their escape attempts. Oh, and I always have a LONG sweater in my car in case of emergencies. There are many emergencies a LONG sweater will aid in covering up.

Yay to the coworkers who have learned to aid YOU and not the humiliating situation. And I'd say that dress should be hung in the closet next to some heinous item from your old Aunt Gertrude, for punishment.

3:37 PM  
Blogger Mae Kyl said...

I keep a whole box of the small gold safety pins in the cabinet above my work space back in the AV office, for you never know when you might need one!

12:06 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home

Tranzliate this Shiznit to Jive!

Click the Spinn'n Rim Beotch! -- Created by 2 high school students to kick myspace's ass